It's not that Cheetah snowboard's must think we're crazy if we're going to buy a $1300 snowboard. In truth, snowsports are where trust fund babies can ride a conveyor belt over and over again so that everyone can see what happens when you stick several grand worth of skis, poles, boots, technical undies, and designer outerwear on an uncoordinated beginner. They might be right there.
It's that Cheetah must think we're stupid. See that slit in the center of the board? That's to allow you to go faster because there is less friction. Except that every skier and boarder knows that to go faster, you get longer skis or a taller board. Increasing surface area means that you have more space to spread your weight, so there is less pressure pushing each point of your board/ski into the snow. That results in less friction. Reducing the area has the opposite effect.
It is true that you can wear skis long enough (in theory) that their weight alone will increase the friction and slow you down, but that would take some damn long skis. Think about opposite extreme: skiing on ice skates. They have a small surface area so all your weight cuts into the ice to get you an edge.
Who would have thought that such a cool looking board could make its rider look like such a tool? I think they are banking on it.