I'll be out for the next week+. Having billed over 260 hours this month, it is a welcome break...
Ciao!
[p.s. does it mean anything that 260 hours now is still worlds better than 200 at the last place?]
I aspire to be intelligent with moments of genius. So far, I have managed awkward with moments of competence.
7.31.2008
Jesus Christ. Seriously, Jesus should look into this...it is risen.
Scrabulous is back on Facebook as "Wordscraper." It has new rules and round pieces. Rules maybe, but can round pieces really be enough to prevent an infringement claim? Bottom line: Gone today, back tomorrow. Clearly someone saw this coming and planned ahead. JC could have prevented a lot of evangelical tax and sex scandals if he had done the same. A little planning Jesus, that's all I'm saying.
7.30.2008
Caution Below: Attorneys Falling
Cadwalader - venerable NY corporate firm - is laying off 90-100 attorneys. For those out of the know, that is an unprecedented number in this industry. The explanation Cad's chairman gave http://www.abovethelaw.com/:
All fine and good, but don't let me catch profits per partner anywhere near where they were last year if you're gonna let people go in such numbers.
"There was a frothiness that occurred as a result of the Blackstones and the Apollos
using mortgage-backed securities to fund their buyouts. It was a lot like junk
bonds becoming the instrument of choice in the late 80's and early 90's."
White explained that, in 2004, there were only $98 billion worth of
mortgage-backed securities issued. In 2008, he said, that number ballooned to
$314 billion. "So we grew right along with client demand. And now that market
has contracted severely. That $314 billion from last year will go to roughly $60
billion in 2008 -- an 80% contraction."
All fine and good, but don't let me catch profits per partner anywhere near where they were last year if you're gonna let people go in such numbers.
Only Users Lose Drugs
Boing boing brings us this gem, about a man who placed a bet in a CA casino with pot. Apparently, due to pot, he ate all of his chips. (Zing!) "C'mon. Daddy needs a new pair of cuffs!" (Burn!)
7.29.2008
Marine Camoflauge
Feel free to watch this whole 5 minute TED video on bio-luminescence and cephalopods, but if you only have a minute, go to 4:00 to see the most incredible octopus I have ever seen.
7.28.2008
Things You Already Knew Because You Are Smarter Than Me
"Market Dislocation" - That popping sound you hear before the pain hits you, telling you that your stock positions are now hanging limply from the empty socket of your trading account.
All kidding aside, this is what market professionals call the subprime crisis, etc. I looked, and it does not appear to be a technical term - i.e. dislocation is not a mathematical or statistical phenomena. Rather, it appears to be a euphemism like "outplacement" instead of "firings" or "nice" instead of "you should date in dimly lit restaurants."
Can anyone find a technical definition?
All kidding aside, this is what market professionals call the subprime crisis, etc. I looked, and it does not appear to be a technical term - i.e. dislocation is not a mathematical or statistical phenomena. Rather, it appears to be a euphemism like "outplacement" instead of "firings" or "nice" instead of "you should date in dimly lit restaurants."
Can anyone find a technical definition?
News, Paid for by Prada
Matthew Yglesias of the Atlantic had a conversation with Paul Krugman of the NYT in which Krugman pointed out that the RE and style elements of the magazine (the Sunday RE section, the style mag, "T") effectively keep the paper afloat.
Interesting, sure. I have two questions. First, would it pay for the NYT to cut back on certain coverage to increase margins for the owner? Taking the opposite tack, is there a way to make the standard news content more attractive to advertisers? I am not sure there is without hindering usability either online or in the paper.
Second, setting aside the Sunday RE guide, which is long-standing, would new additions like T magazine succeed if not for their association with the venerable NYT? If the NYT lends gravitas to these products, it does so largely through its reputation as a news organization, in which case the brand itself has to recieve some credit. Yes, the paper makes the highest margins on ads in peripheral business units, but they spring from a trunk that establishes the brand. Think of Google - the ads pay the bills, but the search and services must continue to improve so that Google remains the most desirable place to place those ads.
Interesting, sure. I have two questions. First, would it pay for the NYT to cut back on certain coverage to increase margins for the owner? Taking the opposite tack, is there a way to make the standard news content more attractive to advertisers? I am not sure there is without hindering usability either online or in the paper.
Second, setting aside the Sunday RE guide, which is long-standing, would new additions like T magazine succeed if not for their association with the venerable NYT? If the NYT lends gravitas to these products, it does so largely through its reputation as a news organization, in which case the brand itself has to recieve some credit. Yes, the paper makes the highest margins on ads in peripheral business units, but they spring from a trunk that establishes the brand. Think of Google - the ads pay the bills, but the search and services must continue to improve so that Google remains the most desirable place to place those ads.
7.27.2008
Dark Knight. Best Picture.
I feel bad for Robert Downey Jr. It's not that Ironman was Oscar-worthy, but here was a return to the great superhero flicks. It had a less-than-perfect protagonist in a believably distraught universe. Of course, Batman is the original troubled playboy-turned- vigilante flyboy and Dark Knight dominates on every level.
Of course, Dark Knight has something Ironman does not, Joker. Watching Heath Leger makes you forget Nicholson ever did the role, and that was considered pretty dark at the time. No, watching Leger conjures up comparisons to Hopkins's Hannibal. An evil so perfectly nuanced and forcefully embraced by its thespian perpetrator it demands rapt reverence at it alternates between screeches and whispers.
The writing was amazing. Extreme dark comic writing without too much cheese. The jokers many-angled schemes were well thought out. The stunts integrated into the schemes so as not to seem excessive in context. And the choice to shoot building collapses and "sky hook snags" in IMAX without the use of CGI, captivating.
Perhaps the best praise: this movie actually deserves all the praise heaped upon it.
Of course, Dark Knight has something Ironman does not, Joker. Watching Heath Leger makes you forget Nicholson ever did the role, and that was considered pretty dark at the time. No, watching Leger conjures up comparisons to Hopkins's Hannibal. An evil so perfectly nuanced and forcefully embraced by its thespian perpetrator it demands rapt reverence at it alternates between screeches and whispers.
The writing was amazing. Extreme dark comic writing without too much cheese. The jokers many-angled schemes were well thought out. The stunts integrated into the schemes so as not to seem excessive in context. And the choice to shoot building collapses and "sky hook snags" in IMAX without the use of CGI, captivating.
Perhaps the best praise: this movie actually deserves all the praise heaped upon it.
7.25.2008
Solar Sails!
Took a while for this tech to get tried, but NASA is ready now. Basically, you take a shiny surface and point it at the sun. Photons from the sun's light bounce off the shiny material and push it forward. In a vacuum, that's enough. Oh, and you need a HUGE sail...check out how this one deploys:
Waterproof Gas
Golden Shellback Gadget Waterproofing from Gizmodo on Vimeo.
This is "Golden Shellback" in action. It doesn't look like anything because it is a coating applied in gas form to the outside of gadgets. It makes it so the water doesn't get in. How? No idea. More when we I have one.
[HT Gizmodo ]
7.24.2008
...You Just Might Get it.
Wrestler asks fans for a folding chair. Fans comply. Hilarity ensues.
http://view.break.com/539758 - Watch more free videos
http://view.break.com/539758 - Watch more free videos
NAC-NAC-NACA on Heaven's Door
NACA held an even in DC over the past few days. The organization helps homeowners who have trouble paying their mortgages work something out - either with the lender, a NACA partner, or even NACA itself. The process seems really responsible - you have to show up with all the paperwork and there are extensive post-transaction assistance programs. This non-profit is doing precisely what some argue the government should do and others argue might be a good idea - but not for the government. This would seem to be best of both worlds.
Here is what I don't get: Funding. NACA has membership dues, but I doubt they are enough to run the whole organization. I can't find information on their site about accepting donations or entering into partnerships. The lack of transparency makes me a little skeptical. Anyone have any insight?
Here is what I don't get: Funding. NACA has membership dues, but I doubt they are enough to run the whole organization. I can't find information on their site about accepting donations or entering into partnerships. The lack of transparency makes me a little skeptical. Anyone have any insight?
7.23.2008
That Word Does Not Mean What You Think It Means.
Sony, Sharp, Hitachi, Samsung and Motorola create "WHDI" network standard. It's a wireless HDMI - a wireless version of a popular HDTV connector. I wonder if anyone realized that "Wahadi" refers to a sect of Muslim extremists.
Ahmed: What did you do this weekend?
Humahn: I put WHDI in my home.
Ahmed: Insh'Allah.
Ahmed: What did you do this weekend?
Humahn: I put WHDI in my home.
Ahmed: Insh'Allah.
7.22.2008
Open Source NetTablet

Michael Arrington at TechCrunch is "tired" of waiting for Apple or others to release a low-cost tablet PC. Low cost lappies, so-called Netbooks, are storming the market. They have pared down specs and usually come with open sources OSs. My mom has an eeePC and loves it. I want Arrington to succeed (and have offered my help to make it happen) because I want one of my own - particularly if it is a tablet.
My requests:
- 10" screen
- Open source (near instant-on) OS.
- OCR handwriting software
- PDF reader.
Arrington wants the basic unit to run Firefox with links to Google Docs, etc. for work. I think that's moving in the right direction. Support him!
Optimus Primed

Optimus is not famous for delivering. Their keyboard, sporting a customizable color LED under EACH KEY arrived really late and REALLY expensive. Their second iteration, the Pultius (above), seems more reasonable. 15 keypad-style customizable keys for any shortcut you could possibly want.
My question: who needs 15 shortcuts? Can I assign macros to them - then, at least keyboard shortcuts would be easier.
7.21.2008
I Totally Thought I Was Done for the Day
Whoa! This showed up at the LA Museum of Science! Amazing.
Extinct, my ASS! from The Original Joe Fisher on Vimeo.
Extinct, my ASS! from The Original Joe Fisher on Vimeo.
I tell lies. You are a liar.
That's the actor-observer bias, in which people tend to see their own actions as episodic and necessitated by external factors, while seeing the same acts by others as consistent character traits. To wit:
I like to take a few minutes to unwind on the couch. You are lazy.
I have an occassional sweet to round out a nice meal. You need to watch what you eat.
What about the positive-negative bias? It seems like a similar attribution error:
I suck. Occassionally, something manages to go right.
People don't really like me. Sure, I was invited, but only because he invited everyone else in the crew.
I like to take a few minutes to unwind on the couch. You are lazy.
I have an occassional sweet to round out a nice meal. You need to watch what you eat.
What about the positive-negative bias? It seems like a similar attribution error:
I suck. Occassionally, something manages to go right.
People don't really like me. Sure, I was invited, but only because he invited everyone else in the crew.
I Am Required to Inform You That Your Murderous Soul Is Damned to Hell For Eternity
South Dakotans don't like abortion, so they passed a law requiring doctors at Planned Parenthood, the state's only abortion clinic, to read a script to a potential abortor telling her that:
Abortion rights advocates filed for and obtained an injunction against the script. The Court of Appeals for the 8th Circuit (a federal appeals court) lifted the injunction, making the script 'operational' as of last Friday.
I've been through all of these arguments before many times, so I won't rehash them here. Suffice it to say that fetuses and mothers both have serious arguments on their sides and that advocates on both sides have been caught up in the politics and emotion of this debate for so long that they aren't really even dealing with each other any more.
I'll limit my comments to political ideology: Conservatives generally favor personal rights, states' rights, and limited government. The recent 2d Amendment ruling was lauded precisely because it championed individual rights and less regulation. This is the polar opposite - and yet it gets the same support from the same supporters. Which means that this is a question of social agenda, not political ideology. If so, has small government conservatism left the Republican party altogether, leaving limited government concerns to the third-party dregs of the libertarian movement?
Also - my political ideology is generally "live and let live." That, to me, jives nicely with classic conservative values. Why have they abandoned it?
- she is "in an existing relationship" with the fetus that is protected by
the U.S. Constitution
- "her existing constitutional rights with regards to that relationship
will be terminated."
- "abortion increases the risk of suicide ideation and suicide."
- and abortion "will terminate the life of a whole, separate, unique living
human being."
Abortion rights advocates filed for and obtained an injunction against the script. The Court of Appeals for the 8th Circuit (a federal appeals court) lifted the injunction, making the script 'operational' as of last Friday.
I've been through all of these arguments before many times, so I won't rehash them here. Suffice it to say that fetuses and mothers both have serious arguments on their sides and that advocates on both sides have been caught up in the politics and emotion of this debate for so long that they aren't really even dealing with each other any more.
I'll limit my comments to political ideology: Conservatives generally favor personal rights, states' rights, and limited government. The recent 2d Amendment ruling was lauded precisely because it championed individual rights and less regulation. This is the polar opposite - and yet it gets the same support from the same supporters. Which means that this is a question of social agenda, not political ideology. If so, has small government conservatism left the Republican party altogether, leaving limited government concerns to the third-party dregs of the libertarian movement?
Also - my political ideology is generally "live and let live." That, to me, jives nicely with classic conservative values. Why have they abandoned it?
7.18.2008
Shouts & Murmurs
Some of us avoid the New Yorker for fear of going over the liberal elite edge. I can think I am better than you, I just don't want you to be able to tell when you glance up on the train and catch me reading.
That said, you simply must read "Shouts & Murmurs." It's the snide humor normally reserved for your neighbor's outfits applied to life at large. This week, Passive Aggressive Appetizers.
That said, you simply must read "Shouts & Murmurs." It's the snide humor normally reserved for your neighbor's outfits applied to life at large. This week, Passive Aggressive Appetizers.
7.17.2008
Napolitano Complex
Fmr. Judge Napolitano of the Jersey Superior Court (state court) is now a fox news legal analyst and, apparently, sometime contributor to the NY Sun. He argues that the Fed's bailout (if it is that yet) of Mr. and Ms. May is unconstitutional. His reasons:
1. General Welfare clause: the government can only spend money for the general welfare, not for private companies. Fannie and Freddie used to be government-owned, but because they have shareholders now, they are no longer eligible for public funds.
2. Equal Protection clause: The goodly judge reminds us that all American laws must be equally applied, so the Fed can't chew gum, I mean provide funds to these companies, unless it brought some for the whole class - including, he points out, Indymac.
First, you'd think a judge would rely on some precedent or case law or something, but the Judge's argument stand instead on bald, sweeping statements about the broadest meaning of Constitution. As a former judge, Mr. Napolito well knows that the Constitution does not operate this way. There are several hundred years of case law setting out the nuances. You have the right counsel, but not for every trial, appeal, or motion. You have the right to assemble, but a permit can be required. And you have the right to equal protection - but that requires a protected class and permits some discretion. You'd expect a judge to at least acknowledge that he's glossing over this - the actual manifestation of the Constitution in modern American law. He doesn't.
Second, the arguments fail on their merits.
General Welfare: Fannie and Freddie own the vast majority of American mortgages, representing both the stability of home ownership and a HUGE chunk of the marketplace. If they fail, it hurts every single American.
Further, the Fed is running to protect these companies in large part because they are tightly regulated so that the market has always had a tacit understanding that they were guaranteed by the Federal government. That government guarantee, long implied and never disavowed, was put in place to empower all Americans to buy homes. If the government now has to make good on it, that is the execution of its powers for the general welfare.
The judge claims the companies are now private. The government caps the size of the loans each can buy and determines what is and is not "conforming." The Macs then don't get to selectively accept or deny loans. How, then, Mr. Napolitano, are these private entities?
Equal Protection: Last I checked financial institutions were not a protected class.
Second, there is the point that Fannie and Freddie aren't truly private entities, and so are part of the government, not citizens of the U.S. like private companies.
Third, what law is being applied unequally here? This is the Federal Reserve, a federal agency, acting within its discretion to carry out its mission - to preserve the integrity of American markets. Every time the Fed acts, it is targeting a subset of the market - why aren't all of those inequitable? Further, there is no charge that Mr. Bernanke is doing this for corrupt purposes. He is acting for the market, not for his personal or political interests.
Finally, the good judge may be looking at this at too high a level. He says the laws should apply equally between the companies. What if the laws should apply equally to the American people? At that level, Bernanke's actions do the most to help Americans equally. Indymac accounts were insured by the FDIC, so investor losses are covered. Fannie and Freddie mortgages are not insured, so damage to buyers is not. As for investors of both Companies - both took known risk and both will now lose all or close to all of their investments. The "bailout" is going to just keep these companies afloat; it won't buy back shares at their prices from 2 years ago. Seems like the Fed's actions treat both investors and depositors/buyers equally, so what's the problem?
1. General Welfare clause: the government can only spend money for the general welfare, not for private companies. Fannie and Freddie used to be government-owned, but because they have shareholders now, they are no longer eligible for public funds.
2. Equal Protection clause: The goodly judge reminds us that all American laws must be equally applied, so the Fed can't chew gum, I mean provide funds to these companies, unless it brought some for the whole class - including, he points out, Indymac.
First, you'd think a judge would rely on some precedent or case law or something, but the Judge's argument stand instead on bald, sweeping statements about the broadest meaning of Constitution. As a former judge, Mr. Napolito well knows that the Constitution does not operate this way. There are several hundred years of case law setting out the nuances. You have the right counsel, but not for every trial, appeal, or motion. You have the right to assemble, but a permit can be required. And you have the right to equal protection - but that requires a protected class and permits some discretion. You'd expect a judge to at least acknowledge that he's glossing over this - the actual manifestation of the Constitution in modern American law. He doesn't.
Second, the arguments fail on their merits.
General Welfare: Fannie and Freddie own the vast majority of American mortgages, representing both the stability of home ownership and a HUGE chunk of the marketplace. If they fail, it hurts every single American.
Further, the Fed is running to protect these companies in large part because they are tightly regulated so that the market has always had a tacit understanding that they were guaranteed by the Federal government. That government guarantee, long implied and never disavowed, was put in place to empower all Americans to buy homes. If the government now has to make good on it, that is the execution of its powers for the general welfare.
The judge claims the companies are now private. The government caps the size of the loans each can buy and determines what is and is not "conforming." The Macs then don't get to selectively accept or deny loans. How, then, Mr. Napolitano, are these private entities?
Equal Protection: Last I checked financial institutions were not a protected class.
Second, there is the point that Fannie and Freddie aren't truly private entities, and so are part of the government, not citizens of the U.S. like private companies.
Third, what law is being applied unequally here? This is the Federal Reserve, a federal agency, acting within its discretion to carry out its mission - to preserve the integrity of American markets. Every time the Fed acts, it is targeting a subset of the market - why aren't all of those inequitable? Further, there is no charge that Mr. Bernanke is doing this for corrupt purposes. He is acting for the market, not for his personal or political interests.
Finally, the good judge may be looking at this at too high a level. He says the laws should apply equally between the companies. What if the laws should apply equally to the American people? At that level, Bernanke's actions do the most to help Americans equally. Indymac accounts were insured by the FDIC, so investor losses are covered. Fannie and Freddie mortgages are not insured, so damage to buyers is not. As for investors of both Companies - both took known risk and both will now lose all or close to all of their investments. The "bailout" is going to just keep these companies afloat; it won't buy back shares at their prices from 2 years ago. Seems like the Fed's actions treat both investors and depositors/buyers equally, so what's the problem?
7.16.2008
Unnecessary Tech
A knob that will "re-analog" the knobs via a touchscreen interface - a really high tech way to go backwards. How about desingning a better touch interface or, even better still, using existing tech. Here is the Griffin Powermate - a USB multi-purpose knob. Couple with a touchscreen and you get the same result. Select the digital knob by touching it with your left hand, adjust using the knob in your right.
Not Feeling a Lot of Sympathy

Marie Jarry - already a good start to a story - called in sick to her job to take this photo. That's her husband, Aaron, on the right. Together, they won Howard Stern's Hottest Wife, Ugliest Husband contest. (I reserve judgment on that).
The story is here because Marie was calling in sick to her job as a second grade teacher in Southington, CT. The school system claims she resigned. She claims she "resigned."
The one interesting note is that the school claims that the resignation was the result of PTA complains about Ms. Jarry's comments regarding the mechanics of sex with her Hubby, not her appearance per se. One point for the parents, and whatever spokesman for the school board picked up on that nugget.
As for Ms. Jarry - I don't feel a lot of sympathy here. HS runs an offensive show that's wide syndicated. You were going on for exposure. You can't complain if that exposure reaches people who might not want their child's teacher - a profession that is very much about the temperament of the particular person - parading in the "King of all Media"'s lair.
7.15.2008
Geeking out for a moment.
E3 is going on right now, which means that there are liveblogs from presentations by Nintendo, MS (XBoX), and Sony (PS3). There isn't a lot of analytic writing in the gaming community. Mostly, it's "Look what's around the corner!" Let's take a quick look back, shall we?
A year ago:
- Wii is greeted with skepticism by competitors. Users, on the other hand, can't get enough of them. That's partly demand, and partly planned scarcity on the part of Nintendo.
- PS3 is derided as a HUGE, EXPENSIVE messianic platform that wasn't. Critics thought it was simply a huge vehicle for Blu Ray and didn't offer much of an advance in the gaming console department.
- XbOX was experiencing the "Ring of Death" debacle, wear three red lights would appear on your xBox - the console's version of "check, please!"
Today:
- Wii is still as hot as the day it hit shelves. It is still hard to get one and the new version isn't making it any easier. Wii fit is even more experimental...and just as popular. Gaming has come back to the masses and gaming during a party (other than a geeks-only LAN party) is born.
- PS3 turns out to be the messiah, but not for games. Blu Ray killed HDTV thanks in large part to the ready-made console market. Sony is laughing all the way to the bank.
- xBox. Hm. The system is not dying any more and there is an external HD. It is the most popular Rock Band and Guitar Hero platform, so that gives you a sense of its market penetration...but that's only because the games weren't released on xBox until recently and xBox gamers either own, or want to own, a Wii.
A year ago:
- Wii is greeted with skepticism by competitors. Users, on the other hand, can't get enough of them. That's partly demand, and partly planned scarcity on the part of Nintendo.
- PS3 is derided as a HUGE, EXPENSIVE messianic platform that wasn't. Critics thought it was simply a huge vehicle for Blu Ray and didn't offer much of an advance in the gaming console department.
- XbOX was experiencing the "Ring of Death" debacle, wear three red lights would appear on your xBox - the console's version of "check, please!"
Today:
- Wii is still as hot as the day it hit shelves. It is still hard to get one and the new version isn't making it any easier. Wii fit is even more experimental...and just as popular. Gaming has come back to the masses and gaming during a party (other than a geeks-only LAN party) is born.
- PS3 turns out to be the messiah, but not for games. Blu Ray killed HDTV thanks in large part to the ready-made console market. Sony is laughing all the way to the bank.
- xBox. Hm. The system is not dying any more and there is an external HD. It is the most popular Rock Band and Guitar Hero platform, so that gives you a sense of its market penetration...but that's only because the games weren't released on xBox until recently and xBox gamers either own, or want to own, a Wii.
7.14.2008
My Non-stolen Car
Good news - our car wasn't stolen. I feel the need to point this out because you begin to imagine all sorts of interesting scenarios when you return to the last place you left your car and discover it isn't there.
Thursday, I parked the car down the block from some "Emergency Parking" notices. Not noticing any notices down my way, I figured I was safe. Walking around the neighborhood this past Saturday afternoon, I found a 2000 blue Volvo sedan parked there instead. If not for the Honda Passport parked outside my building sporting a broken window with glass scattered along the sidewalk, I would have just assumed that I miscalculated and the car had been towed. The broken window conjured up stats of oft-stolen civics, a rising west-end crime rate, and so on.
Saturday turned from dinner and movie into car titles, websites, and phone calls. First, to the GEICO site to check coverage. There I found "What to do if your car is stolen." That alone was worth the price of admission - particularly because it told me that I was covered. Second, I went to the DC DMV site to see if I had been ticketed. If I had a ticket, I reasoned, I was towed. No ticket.
Not giving up, I headed outside for another walk around my neighborhood and my short term memory. My normal neighbors were treated to a meandering twenty-something, looking first this way and that, then down at his Blackberry calendar, then intently up at the sky-down at the ground-up at the sky, and finally off down the street to repeat.
I was sure when I left the house that I had parked in Volvo spot. I returned damn-near positive. I pulled up another site - DC's Tow lot. Turns out that they too have an online form to fill out if you were towed. It didn't find the car. Neither did a call.
Geico says you should get a police report before you call them, so I called 311. This is not a non-emergency number, it is the "Mayor's Information Hotline." No biggie. They took down my information and that of the car, and promised to have someone call me back.
Having nothing else to do but wait, RSC and I headed for a bite to eat. She wanted to know what to expect now that we might be filing an insurance claim. I guessed about a 1-week investigation, 2 weeks for claims, and perhaps a month before we saw a check. I thought we might see something near the Kelly BlueBook value for the car. It would not enough to buy a new one, but it'd put a dent in the purchase price.
We sat amidst the partiers in an Adams Morgan eatery and chatted. A new car would be an automatic instead of our manual. It might be a Hyundai, given our friends' recent experiences. It'd need 4 doors and good mileage, but it didn't really need sex appeal. We recounted past experiences when we were robbed and how it isn't so much the loss of goods as it is the violation of "the stuff I include within my space." Of course, I said, I've experienced enough change in my life to realize how widely the human experience varies. While I don't understand what would make someone steal, I don't doubt that for some people it is a reality that isn't just normal, but preferable. I don't think they do it for fun.
RSC and I were in a 7-11 grabbing dessert when we found out they didn't do it at all. A woman, who sounded heavyset, droned and bulged through my handset to explain that the car wasn't stolen, but relocated. Uh huh. Relocated to where. 1700 Florida. Northwest DC? Yes. So it hasn't been towed. No, sir, relocated. I hang up and explain to RSC that the car has been relocated. Towed? Yes, I suppose, they had to tow it to the new spot, but they didn't tow it to the impound lot. A boon, as the impound lot rates are quite a bit higher than simply having your car moved.
Of course, the impound lot also keeps track of your car. The woman on the phone doesn't. She wasn't there when they moved the car and she wasn't there in the 100 degree Sunday morning sun as I again set out to scour the DC streets. She also didn't interface with the Metro Police Department located 1 block south from the epicenter of my search. 20 minutes later, I spotted my silver Honda Civic parked on the 1700 block, only three blocks south of the promised spot.
I learned that Comprehensive Insurance feels amazing the second you think you might need it - naches for only $70/year. I learned that, in the event of a robbery, I have my ducks in a row. Oh, and I learned that searching for a car of which there is at least one per block can be emotionally taxing. You stop quickening your step by the time you're checking whether the eighth one might be yours.
Thursday, I parked the car down the block from some "Emergency Parking" notices. Not noticing any notices down my way, I figured I was safe. Walking around the neighborhood this past Saturday afternoon, I found a 2000 blue Volvo sedan parked there instead. If not for the Honda Passport parked outside my building sporting a broken window with glass scattered along the sidewalk, I would have just assumed that I miscalculated and the car had been towed. The broken window conjured up stats of oft-stolen civics, a rising west-end crime rate, and so on.
Saturday turned from dinner and movie into car titles, websites, and phone calls. First, to the GEICO site to check coverage. There I found "What to do if your car is stolen." That alone was worth the price of admission - particularly because it told me that I was covered. Second, I went to the DC DMV site to see if I had been ticketed. If I had a ticket, I reasoned, I was towed. No ticket.
Not giving up, I headed outside for another walk around my neighborhood and my short term memory. My normal neighbors were treated to a meandering twenty-something, looking first this way and that, then down at his Blackberry calendar, then intently up at the sky-down at the ground-up at the sky, and finally off down the street to repeat.
I was sure when I left the house that I had parked in Volvo spot. I returned damn-near positive. I pulled up another site - DC's Tow lot. Turns out that they too have an online form to fill out if you were towed. It didn't find the car. Neither did a call.
Geico says you should get a police report before you call them, so I called 311. This is not a non-emergency number, it is the "Mayor's Information Hotline." No biggie. They took down my information and that of the car, and promised to have someone call me back.
Having nothing else to do but wait, RSC and I headed for a bite to eat. She wanted to know what to expect now that we might be filing an insurance claim. I guessed about a 1-week investigation, 2 weeks for claims, and perhaps a month before we saw a check. I thought we might see something near the Kelly BlueBook value for the car. It would not enough to buy a new one, but it'd put a dent in the purchase price.
We sat amidst the partiers in an Adams Morgan eatery and chatted. A new car would be an automatic instead of our manual. It might be a Hyundai, given our friends' recent experiences. It'd need 4 doors and good mileage, but it didn't really need sex appeal. We recounted past experiences when we were robbed and how it isn't so much the loss of goods as it is the violation of "the stuff I include within my space." Of course, I said, I've experienced enough change in my life to realize how widely the human experience varies. While I don't understand what would make someone steal, I don't doubt that for some people it is a reality that isn't just normal, but preferable. I don't think they do it for fun.
RSC and I were in a 7-11 grabbing dessert when we found out they didn't do it at all. A woman, who sounded heavyset, droned and bulged through my handset to explain that the car wasn't stolen, but relocated. Uh huh. Relocated to where. 1700 Florida. Northwest DC? Yes. So it hasn't been towed. No, sir, relocated. I hang up and explain to RSC that the car has been relocated. Towed? Yes, I suppose, they had to tow it to the new spot, but they didn't tow it to the impound lot. A boon, as the impound lot rates are quite a bit higher than simply having your car moved.
Of course, the impound lot also keeps track of your car. The woman on the phone doesn't. She wasn't there when they moved the car and she wasn't there in the 100 degree Sunday morning sun as I again set out to scour the DC streets. She also didn't interface with the Metro Police Department located 1 block south from the epicenter of my search. 20 minutes later, I spotted my silver Honda Civic parked on the 1700 block, only three blocks south of the promised spot.
I learned that Comprehensive Insurance feels amazing the second you think you might need it - naches for only $70/year. I learned that, in the event of a robbery, I have my ducks in a row. Oh, and I learned that searching for a car of which there is at least one per block can be emotionally taxing. You stop quickening your step by the time you're checking whether the eighth one might be yours.
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